Having been married to the love of my life for decades, I find that what matters most to me is not that she performs perfectly at fulfilling a checklist of expectations but rather that she delights in knowing me and being known by me.  The adventure of discovery as we both do life together is part of the process.

She has matured beyond the young woman she was when I first met her because her knowledge of God has increased over the years, and her experience of Him has grown as well.  The same holds true for me.  If we had a checklist from the start that we were unyielding about, it would have ended our relationship many years ago, or it would have put us in such bondage as to not allow for growth and maturity.

Whenever a checklist of to-dos is allowed to become involved, the idea of closeness is pushed to the side. If items on the checklist are incomplete, a sense of disapproval sets in, and the idea of closeness is put on hold.  The checklist becomes the barometer for approval or disapproval.  That means the relationship is based on performing certain tasks as opposed to an interest in discovering each other and appreciating what is discovered. When delightful discovery is the quest, even odd quirks can become delightful and intriguing things because they are what makes a person an individual and unique.  I know I have quirks that my wife has to look past.

I do not want my wife to be me, and I’m pretty sure she isn’t hoping I will be her.  Real relationships at the human level involve knowing how to overcome the nuances of differences and come out on the other side of experiencing the differences with greater depth and stronger respect and appreciation.

I see things about my wife that I respect and appreciate, even if they differ from my preferences. These things make her stand out as an individual and help me trust her even more when I let her just be her.   The Lord did not put us together to fix each other.  He put us together to love each other.  The more this is understood and appreciated, the stronger our relationship will grow.

When it comes to God and who He is, there are no quirks about Him, as He is absolutely perfect.  The fact that He is perfect should be a plus to us.  That means He makes no mistakes.  Everything He does is the right thing, and it is always perfectly timed because He is able to see the end from the beginning.  He is not bound to time as we are and thus can know just what to say and how to lead based on knowing forward and backward what is going on presently and what is just around the corner.  Add to that the fact that He cannot lie, and you have a recipe for trust on a whole other level.

Abram trusted God when God appeared to him in a vision and told him that He was his shield and exceedingly great reward. Abram believed this about God, and it led him to ask boldly for something he deeply desired.  God then promised Abram he would not only have an heir from his own body but that his descendants would outnumber the stars of the heavens.  Abram believed in God, and it was accredited to him for righteousness.  In other words, Abram entered into a deep, unmerited relationship with God based purely on faith in God.  Abram believed God was as good as He had declared Himself to be to Abram, and it led Abram to be able to boldly ask for favor from God in an area of deep concern.

Real relationships trust and rely on the other party to be who they claim to be. They then ask for things, make decisions, and move forward on the basis of such trust without fearing it will bring an end to the relationship but instead lead to further discovery and bring hope into it.

This is why Scripture says, come boldly before the throne of grace to find mercy to help in your time of need.   It describes what a real relationship looks like.  Religion says to get it together before you even think about approaching.  God is good, and He has invited us to come to Him, trust Him, and ask of Him.  Our approaching and asking says a lot about the depth of our relationship with Him.